An Insight into What Is That a Teenager is Actually Looking For

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Many aspects that of physical, mental and emotional encompasses the child’s development. The child must be supported and motivated in all areas especially by their mothers. This encourages the child to develop in all aspects. The primary caregivers are the mothers. The bonding and attachments they develop with the child give them a unique position of influencing the child development and growth in all areas.

The bond between the mother and child is formed from the day of conception. The moment they are brought together physically, the bonding and the trust develop between the two.

One of the Life’s Major Challenges

One of the Life’s major challenges is to raise a healthy and a happy child. Starting from an infant, to toddlers, to teenagers and the journey goes on. Various parenting prerequisites – a quality education, mental and emotional stability, a good job, a safe and secure environment needs to be overcome.

Teenage is the most crucial and delicate time when the child is looking for SO MUCH…

  • A safe and secure place to figure out themselves

Teenagers are dynamic and always changing. Their moods change like their clothes. There are days when nothing feels right and there are other days when they need to figure out what is right. The greatest job as a Mom is to act like even they don’t notice.

  • Boundaries

The teenage need to know what is utterly ok, and what is not. Even at times of resisting the rules, deep down they feel secure when they have clear-cut rules without alterations. Making them clear and consistent and having known the consequences when they break rules, an internal feeling of being secure is developed. Boundaries make them feel secure.

  •  Freedom

The teenager needs opportunities to stretch their wings within the boundaries. They need to be encouraged, and at times even be pushed to try new things, to find adventures, and to take risks. They need to be kept busy engaging in exciting activities and doing character building. With freedom comes responsibility. An act of irresponsibility, they lose freedom. The freedom given needs to be taken seriously. Enjoy them becoming adults before your eyes.

  • A listening ear

The teens need to talk. They open up when given a chance. Take them alone, spend time together and make them clear that you want to listen to them, listen about their interests, their lives. Be patient. Try out different places and a different time. Push through the awkward and bring up the subjects and make them jiggle (say hello to puberty!). This makes them clear that I am OK with any topic and every topic. A feeling that I am available always and am comfortable in talking anything. A teenage needs the most is A Mom who listens and does not criticize.

  • A good sense of humor

Hilarious and teens go hand in hand. The favorite thing during teens – is hilarious. There is hardly anything like a bond of a good laugh with your teenagers. There is plenty of fun and clean funny entertainment if you look for it. Encouraging a good sense of humor gets the kid through many trials in life.

  • Touch

Teenagers do need hugs from Mom. Keep a routine and a normal affair of hugging. Love them even they refuse to show.

  • Genuine interest

Learn to love what your teenager loves. Or at least have enough know-how about their passions and engage in a decent conversation. This keeps the door open to you ever!

  • Forgiveness

To err is human and so is with teens. Lots and lots of them. Acting selfish, spacing out and what not, making them feel insecure and stupid. They at time mess up so much leaving you with a thought wondering where did you go wrong. Know that it is going to be there, that won’t turn you down. Things shall settle with a grace.

  • Guidance

Your teenager wants you to guide them. They show that they don’t want but actually they do. Keep it brief and relevant, but speak out solid words of advice when seeing them facing forks in the road. You are their greatest resource. They need your direction. A thank shall always be there even if it comes later in their lives.

  • Encouragement

Be the greatest fan. Be their cheerleader. Believe in them with your heart and tell them that you do so. Being authentic helps in finding their greatest gifting.

  • Being An Ideal Role Model

Kids watch us. They get the most out of the idea of what is right and what is wrong, what is good and what is bad from your actions than your words. So you owe a great position. If you teach your child to see good in others, make sure you do so. Model the kind you want them to be.

Mom is involved is teens in every step. Listening, sharing jokes, being in discipline or hugging them… being in close proximity.

For the mom’s having long working hours and not being able to be physically involved with their child, need to creatively find solutions. Making adjustments or sacrifices would never make you feel regret. The key is to be there as much as possible. Put your job as a parent prior to anything that you possibly have.

At times it may feel crazy balancing all… what is required more the grace, the rules, space, hugs or advice or WHAT!??? It’ ok. Pray a lot. Communicate openly and let them know honestly you don’t know what they want but you are there for them and want to be there for them.

Investing in those early years, the doors of trust and respect shall remain open ever always. Wishing You Happy and Intimate Relationships. God Bless 

 

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